This is just for Tabitha

Sometimes I rebuttal to myself after having a conversation where I wish I could’ve used the rebuttal. I was handing out roses to lady customers at work today and a coworker asked me if I was doing my “real job.” It’s lazy leadership like that from corporate a mindset that gets me understanding some of my coworkers who have work decades for the company and have said it use to be better when we weren’t owned by a large company.

I saw that aforementioned coworker in passing after my lunch and I was bold enough to tell him that my rebuttal would’ve said, “My first priority at this job is customer service,” and I’m sure that giving free roses that makes people smile fits into the category of customer service. He was more worried about his identity and if he got what he concerned was respect for being a superior to me. I hate all of that pettiness so had to steep in that rebuttal, until now.

A lot of people are also petty and don’t like Lil’ Wayne for his “simplicity” and distant beliefs. Sure. Those people have stiff necks and wouldn’t hear my rebuttal for that neither. Wayne said in a documentary that he raps to get stuff off his mind. If you don’t think like he does than you wouldn’t understand, but I understand the need to process a gump of “feelings” that are often retained and tossed around until they can be construed however you make art or create.

I was in a meeting with a coworker before who was questioning me, and I responded in the way I do that sometimes gets people heated in moments.

I am trying to remember what she said.

I won’t exploit her, anyway, and will just say that sometimes I rebuttal or engage in a way that catches people so off guard that they stumble over a timely and proper response, and they get embarrassed for stumbling in a moment where I think they imagined they would have been perfect like a president at a press conference.

So I back off and move along. I’m sure I could give more grace, but I also think I could engage wiser to where the conversation would willingly go on and not just be snuffed out by each other’s expectations (and our lack to meet them).

I just wanted to write. I hope you aren’t offended. I know a girl who appreciates this and she use to date a kid who lied about me and said I kicked his cat. I think my mom beat me over that one. Keep on.